Category Archives: Favorite Things

“Let’s Be Brave and Search Alone-Together”: Q’s 13 – 18

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My friend, Tia, has started a tumblr (inspired by a production being put on by a local theatre company) encouraging folks to go on an Identity Scavenger Hunt.  And in her rallying cry of “let’s be brave and search alone-together” (which I love love love love) – I’m all in.  And I encourage you to play along as well! Over the next 30 days or so, Tia will be posting a question or two a day from the famous Proust Questionnaire on the tumblr.  I’ll be doing my best to keep up and answer the questions here; my approach will be to not think too much about any one answer and to go from the gut.  You can answer the questions on the Identity Scavenger Hunt tumblr, on your own blog, in your journal, in your head, or feel free to e-mail answers directly to the lovely Tia at theatretia@gmail.com – she may want to use some of your answers in different ways in the future!

I missed a few days… so here’s a catch-up!

13. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

“I feel like _____. “; “like”; “I mean…seriously.”; “You know what I mean?”; “Does that make sense?”; and my phone autocorrects “ha” or “hahaha” to “BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” – so there’s that. (I also overuse “so there’s that”).

14. What is your greatest regret?

I love this imperfect little life I am leading even on the ficklest of days, I truly do, and to change one thing would be to change everything. BUT, while I am grateful for my training and education, I greatly regret not auditioning for highly competitive undergrad programs when I was looking into colleges. I had the grades, the SAT scores, the extra-curriculars, the accolades, and the appropriately high-school leveled chops to compete for a slot at a top program but was ignorant to what existed in the world of academic theatre and how qualified I was to go after a place at a top school that would have put me in a strata/market to more easily go after The Dream post-graduation. I was also terrified to audition for a school.  Silly 17 year old, me – you shoulda taken more risks, kid!

15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?

What: Cheese, coffee, or bourbon – they are gonna have to duke it out; Who: someone I have yet to meet or know…or be a caretaker/parent to.

16. When and where were you happiest?

Every summer growing up from the time I was born, my family would go to the beach for a 2 – 3 week chunk of time and then shoot down to the family-shared condo whenever others in the extended family weren’t using it. I lived for those beach weeks. I loved those beach weeks. And because of those beach weeks,  I’m always happiest when close to the ocean.  Someone I knew for a few years once told me that in all the time we spent together, the most relaxed I’d ever appeared was when I was by the ocean.  Sand between my toes, salty air, and the sounds of moving water help me breathe easier.

View from the stairwell of my home-away-from-home every summer from 2 months old - 18 years old. I still miss this place.

View from the stairwell of my home-away-from-home every summer from 2 months old – 18 years old. I still miss this place.

17. Which talent would you most like to have?

Musical talent. I would love to have the kind of vocal ability that seems gifted by the Gods. BRING ME THE VOICE OF ADELE OR JOHN LEGEND!!!

18. What is your current state of mind?

Scattered: I’m in love with many things going on right now and am excited about upcoming plans, theatre, weddings, life. But I’m also bored with some stuff, sad about some other stuff, and a little frustrated with myself on a point or two. It all tug-of-wars in my brain for attention.

“Let’s Be Brave and Search Alone-Together”: Q’s 7 & 8

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My friend, Tia, has started a tumblr (inspired by a production being put on by a local theatre company) encouraging folks to go on an Identity Scavenger Hunt.  And in her rallying cry of “let’s be brave and search alone-together” (which I love love love love) – I’m all in.  And I encourage you to play along as well! Over the next 30 days or so, Tia will be posting a question or two a day from the famous Proust Questionnaire on the tumblr.  I’ll be doing my best to keep up and answer the questions here; my approach will be to not think too much about any one answer and to go from the gut.  You can answer the questions on the Identity Scavenger Hunt tumblr, on your own blog, in your journal, in your head, or feel free to e-mail answers directly to the lovely Tia at theatretia@gmail.com – she may want to use some of your answers in different ways in the future!

7. What is your greatest extravagance?

Bedding. I love bedding. I have alluded to this love ever so slightly three times before, but never in-depth… so here we go.

At the end of a long day, I want to be enveloped by a comfortable, beautiful space where I can truly relax. If you can’t feel good sinking into your bed at night, what can you feel good about? Plus switching up bedding is the simplest way of changing the look of your bedroom – and I am easily bored and like to inject new colors and patterns into a space that essentially stays the same in all other ways. A prettily made bed also makes me feel like I’ve got my *ish* together every time I look at it, even if I don’t really – which is why I make my bed every day. That being said, I don’t always go for the fancy stuff. And I love having brightly colored polka-dotted or printed sheets contrast a paisley patterned quilt or muted, sophisticated duvet.

I think in some ways, the hoarding of bedding stems from a period of my life when I lived in a not-so-cat-friendly group house and Fabs had to have bedroom access at all times because her food, water, and litterboxes had to be in my room (gross…I know). Due to a urinary tract infection, Fab had a number of accidents on the bed (gross…I know) – and then continued occasionally doing that even after the UTI cleared (gross…I know!!!). Thank goodness my mattress was protected, but I needed back-up bedding so that I could clean things up and still sleep in my room vs. waiting for bedding to be washed and dried to sleep in my own room. Now that I live by myself, the KitBit’s necessities are in more fitting locations around the apartment and she does not have access to my room unless I’m in there with her.  Despite the fact that compromised bedding has long since worked its way out of rotation, the need for ALL OF THE BEDDING remains.

So now that I’ve said the gross things…here’s the pretty bedding!

The current hotness #forsheetsandgiggles

Spring 2015: The current hotness; quilt pattern close-ups and the hot pink polka-dotted sheets it is currently paired with. Current total pillow count: 8 pillows. #forsheetsandgiggles

Spring/Summer 2014 favorite - peacockin' y'all; also the quilt came with three pillows. #forsheetsandgiggles

Spring/Summer 2014 favorite – peacockin’ y’all;  the quilt came with 3 pillows. Total pillow count: 7 pillows.  #winning #forsheetsandgiggles

Favorite winter bedding. #forsheetsandgiggles

Favorite winter bedding OF ALL TIME – I may have two of these duvet covers because if one duvet cover dies, I MUST STILL HAVE THIS. You can’t see it here, but there is shimmery gold thread used on the designs. And the textures and patterns vary greatly from section to section.  LOVE. Total pillow count: 8 pillows.  #forsheetsandgiggles

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Back-up winter bedding new in 2015 and also how I got 3 more pillows!  Total pillow count: 10 pillows.  10 pillows felt excessive and helped me coin a phrase – #beditor – because sometimes you need a bedding editor. 2 pillows eventually got punted to the living room. #forsheetsandgiggles

8. What is your favorite journey?

This life. Or the band. But probably this life.

A Fauxdult Girl’s Favorite Things: Break-up Edition

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Here is my Oprah-style favorites list for what you need in the wake of a break as you try to adjust to a new approach of living your life.

A FAUXDULT GIRL’S FAVORITE THINGS: BREAK-UP EDITION

Flowers – Buy flowers of a non-romantic variety – like gerbera daisies in bright orange – and put them somewhere you will see them as soon as you enter your home. They brighten the mood and are a subtle reminder that many good things that bring happiness are not designed to last forever –  and that is a-OK; in part, that is what makes them beautiful.

Furballs – There is nothing better than curling up with your highly sensitive, typically grumpy but now oddly affectionate cat, playing with your fosters, or working with some shelter adoptables to help ease your soul. Feeling sad? Hold something furry! Tears coming? Let a pup lick them away – they like the salt!

Mambo is the best therapy dog and she gives amazing kisses.

And you thought you wouldn’t be kissed again for a long time… look at that!

 

Elastic waistbands – Ladyboo – you are going to want to be comfortable. Loose fitting clothing and loungewear are your friends. Don’t judge – wear anything that makes you feel comfy. Bust out those faux business pants and skirts that look like they have real-people fasteners like zippers and buttons but secretly have elastic and wear the hell out of them. But make sure you feel GOOD about what you are wearing. Don’t wear sweatpants too much. That will make you feel worse. Yoga pants are your buddy at home.

Deep Steep sugar scrub in passionfruit-guava – This stuff is luxurious –  it makes your body feel amazing and your skin super-smooth while smelling absolutely delicious. It provides a nice escape for a few minutes in the shower and is a great way to Treat. Yo. Self. Because you certainly deserve to Treat. Yo. Self.

Delicious

Delicious and cruelty-free

 

Bourbon – Bulleit or a bottle of Four Roses (better when brought by one of your Meg(h)ans). Mix with bitters (better when brought by a friend). Pop some star-shaped ice cubes in there and a glitter swizzle stick and breathe. Enjoy in moderation and best when shared with a buddy. Bourbon is God’s way of letting you know that He/She exists and that humans are deserving of love. Relax.

Waterproof mascara – Tarte’s Lights, Camera, Splashes! waterproof mascara – cruelty free and phenomenal.

Cry-proofing perfection

Cry-proofing perfection.

 

Privacy settings on social media – Use them. Privatize albums and photos. Deactivate accounts for stretches of time. Limit your own access to people’s feeds and streams and change alert settings. Technology is pretty intense and there are ways to make sure you don’t see things you don’t think you can handle yet. Do not be ashamed to use all the bells and whistles to your advantage.

Smudge/Sage – All aboard the Ritual Train to Hippy Dippy Break-up Town, USA!  Doing something to clear the space and create a blank slate is useful if not for any other reason than to clear your own brain. After the Ritual Boxing of Items and Ritual Exchanging of Things, when your physical space is clear of tangible items reminding you of what is now past, burn this shizz around your apartment and make intentions for now and the future. Breathe.

To new beginnings, a clean space, a clear mind, an open heart, a strong spine, and remembering to be kind to and respectful of the obstacles this year has brought.

To new beginnings, a clean space, a clear mind, an open heart, a strong spine, and remembering to be kind to and respectful of the obstacles this year has brought.

 

Family and Friends – I have touched on this before, but let people know about the break-up and be honest with them about what you need. Message it out to your nearest and dearest and others who will be affected by your lack of full presence in the immediate. It is OK.  Most everyone has been there and will understand.  There will also be lots of hugs. “And YOU get a hug! And YOU get a hug!  AND YOU GET A HUG! EVERYBODY GETS HUGS!!”

INSTRUCTIONS by Neil Gaiman – Read this poem. Read it and take heart.

"Trust your heart, and trust your story."

“Trust your heart, and trust your story.”

 

Respect – Respect what is past. Respect the relationship you had. Treat it with care because it is broken and fragile. When you get sad or mad or frustrated about losing someone you love, check yourself and temper your response. Be human.  Be honest. But be kind and loving. To yourself and to the person and relationship you lost. Never stop giving respect. Ever. And respect yourself and the wishes of others enough to have a clean break and start moving on.