My friend, Tia, has started a tumblr (inspired by a production being put on by a local theatre company) encouraging folks to go on an Identity Scavenger Hunt. And in her rallying cry of “let’s be brave and search alone-together” (which I love love love love) – I’m all in. And I encourage you to play along as well! Over the next 30 days or so, Tia will be posting a question or two a day from the famous Proust Questionnaire on the tumblr. I’ll be doing my best to keep up and answer the questions here; my approach will be to not think too much about any one answer and to go from the gut. You can answer the questions on the Identity Scavenger Hunt tumblr, on your own blog, in your journal, in your head, or feel free to e-mail answers directly to the lovely Tia at email@example.com – she may want to use some of your answers in different ways in the future!
11. What do you dislike the most about your appearance?
My skin. I never had real problem-skin until my mid-twenties and now I have fairly bad facial scarring and the occasional really bad breakout. I know my acne issues are hormonal and it is an active choice on my part to not regulate that hormonal shizz, but it’s still a pain – sometimes a literal pain. To add to it, a medicine I was put on this past fall to try to manage the breakouts actually gave me the worst breakouts I’ve ever had and resulted in the worst scarring. PLUS the pills gave me anxiety attacks. So I went off of those and am now relying on topical and homeopathic management techniques along with going easy on dairy and drinking more water.
I will say that my skin has gotten a lot better since October, but is definitely still healing from the dermatological assault of this fall. And I’m visually adjusting to the facial/neck scars, some of which may be permanent. If I could erase them all, I would in a heartbeat. I looked into laser treatments but for some folks, those treatments can actually make skin gain the texture/appearance of an orange peel. I figured that I haven’t had that much luck with my skin lately and if I took expensive measures that only gave me a different and somewhat worse problem, I would lose my cool entirely.
So thank goodness for good (cruelty-free) make-up. And soft lighting. And – ya know – personality and heart and the things that *actually* matter.
12. Which living person do you most despise?
The “flip” answer after writing the above is “my dermatologist.” But honestly, this has me stumped. Ooooooph.
I can count on less than one hand the number of people I can’t stand – mainly people who did the internal emotional equivalent of flipping tables and trashing hotel rooms when they were in my life. Like – really messed up stuff. But *despise* feels so strong. I don’t *despise* these people because to do that much damage, you have to have been close at some point. And to be close, means that I emotionally understand some of the reasons these people are they way they are. And empathize to a degree. Which takes the edge off slightly and knocks potential *despise* down a rung or two…
For me, I think that *despise* must be reserved for real world evil. There isn’t one specific living person who comes to mind but I do despise the people who abuse their animals and dump them at the shelter for no good reason. Nothing elicits more rage from me than seeing under-fed, hurt, helpless creatures and knowing that someone was charged with their well-being and refused to give even the base amount of care necessary for a living creature to simply survive. I do truly despise these people.
OK – that was rough. After thinking about people I don’t like and trying to figure out who I may despise, I need a little happiness. Here’s a great video about people doing GOOD in the world from HooplaHa’s Facebook. I am a friend and fan of Dr. Spats and after this video, I bet you will be, too.